Faith at its finest


Purify my heart
Let me be as gold and precious silver
Purify my heart
Let me be as gold, pure gold

Refiner’s fire
My heart’s one desire
Is to be holy, holy
Set apart for You, Lord
I choose to be holy, holy
Set apart for You, my Master
Ready to do Your will

Purify my heart
Cleanse me from my sin
And make me holy
Purify my heart
Cleanse me from my sin
Deep within

-Refiner’s Fire

Night life at home: At bed. Net open. iPad on my chest. A worship song playing all night long.

Few knew that I almost cry everyday. Or maybe none.

I somehow catch myself staring at things and just being thankful for an object, place, person or event’s purpose. I started being like this when He gave me this call, the Passion Savings. And the more I felt the tears when days grew in numbers and challenges started branching out.

Honest to goodness, a lot of thoughts kept running in my head every now and then. Even when I just lay down or walk my way, I tend to have things in mind and just ended up in awe knowing that everything boils down to one reason and solution: God.

It’s now the month of July and I have never seen myself at this kind of state than lately. At home. Rest. Medicine. Script. Skype. Blog. Ministry Partner. Prayer. A worship song playing all day long.

Whenever I reflect and do a report of what happened the long day, I can’t resist but see myself in tears. He never allows a day to pass without an encouragement, wisdom and a prayer.

Much of how I want to magnify this sickness, God leads me on my knees to magnify His Name. I know that even before this illness started, the battle has already began. He was actually readying my heart, after the long years it chose not to be engaged to His army.

Eventually, I lost work. I felt how God’s pruning my heart. How He’s seeing and accessing me with His eyes. And how I am tested with the commitment He instills in me. Not my money or my talents, but my availability and devotion.

Last May, I was led to surrender my heart’s desires. Then, my comforts. And just when June ended, my income. I could drown by just thinking these series of events but God gives me one word against all odds: TRUST.

I may try to understand everything, seek for answers for all of these situations and know the best of the best cure yet He keeps on reminding me that never will my mind can conceive the way His mind does. And I cry every time I see myself trying to cope up with God’s lordship. I just can’t contain His greatness and majesty.

These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold–though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.
-1 Peter 1:7

Faith. This is my word for the day. After one ministry partner told me that he sees it as my spiritual gift, I was just being led today to meditate on it. He shared that God strengthens a desire yet purifies it. And when He purifies it, He pushes our faith through the fire.

Ask why? So that it will bring praise and glory to Jesus.

It’s really nerve breaking but this is how God desires our faith to be genuine. That though trials come, we are not shaken. We will not tremble.

Faith. It’s not being vague, in its essence, but it gives meaning, hope and peace despite the thought of vagueness. It’s seeing the best and greatest ‘will be’ in all circumstances.

It’s like a race where you don’t see the end. The more we seek for the finish line, the more we desire to win. Yet, we then feel the run taking so long. We tend to feel the burden, the weariness, the impatience.

Left. Right. Straight ahead. At home. Rest. Medicine. Script. Skype. Blog. Ministry Partner. Prayer. A worship song playing all day long.

Though the end seems to be unseen, we still see ourselves running and taking every step with boldness. For when we set our hearts and mind to the finish line, everything will find its worth. The long walk, patience, prayer and passion, will never be in vain.

To acknowledge God’s sovereignty over our lives declares how we look upon Him with our eyes of faith.

Sove-reign-ity. Knowing and believing in an unseen God’s overall reign in our lives. Our priority is ourselves. Yet God’s priority is God. He places our faith in fire for His glory. For His glory to be revealed to the whole world.

Faith and His sovereignty go together. We cannot have faith on something we cannot depend on. And the best dependence is only on His lordship.

I walk in this ministry, through tears and joy, by God’s grace. It may not sound to make sense in some, inexplicable to explain, mysterious, unimaginable or even painful, but I enjoy every ‘wow’ moment when the only things I have in front of my spiritual eyes are miracles and answered prayers reflecting the sovereignty of God.

Faith. I always pray to enjoy it. I pray for it to be at its finest.

Not yet but will be
Not yet known but will be
Not yet seen but will be
Not yet on hand but will be
Not yet here but will be
Not yet but will be.

Be. Do. Go. And Love. By faith.


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