10/11/12

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Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6

I have been wide awake for days, weeks, months, and years, now. Or, should I say I have gone so used to getting sleep-deprived that I no longer check the time or catch up with that far more than a dream beauty rest.

Sleepless nights, eyebags and procrastination are just a few of the trademarks of students. Well, it still depends on what keeps one awake when everyone in the house is supposedly asleep.

FYI, I don’t easily and normally wear eyebags despite my countless overnight reviews and to-do’s. Actually, I get alarmed whenever those puffs appear before my cheeks. Laugh.

Any how, I am one of the thousands who stay up late just to make up school stuffs and articles. I am actually reprimanded with my sleeping habits a lot of times and I am slowly overcoming this kind of body clock.

Much of the no-sleep madness I have, I am more than glad to reap sweet fruits of my labor. People knew me as a productive and smart lass in the streets. I grew up with affirmations as breakfasts, respect as lunch and certificates as dinner.

However, as I kept striding along life, God impressed to me that the attempt of knowing everything is never the be-all and end-all of a purposeful life.

This verse revealed to me that the more we trust God, the more we gain than lose. In fact, we have nothing good to lose when we follow Him. He assures to make our paths straight when we submit to His perfect will.

Technically speaking, it’s my final year in college, and the last of my schooling duties if ever. But no thick books, no shiny medals, no black and whites, not even recognitions can be compared to the wisdom of our God, the treasures in heaven, the truths of the Bible, and the majesty of our Father.

Today, I was rebuked.

After my exam, my professor talked to me and advised me one thing: Prioritize.

I was still feeling the weight of my head that time when I asked her about the undefined grade she gave me in midterm. Before I knew it, my mentor was already speaking like my mother.

She was not mad but she rebuked my mediocrity with love. She understood my situation but she never saw that as a factor to exempt me in her class.

She shared that she heard good things about my class standings and journalistic skills. She knew that I have the potential.

So she said, “I expected.”

I felt ashamed as well as appreciated when I heard her views. I realized how lame I was to get so affected with my commitments that I sacrificed my school record. At the same time, I felt appreciated after learning that my professor was concern to me, from my studies, libel case, Dawn, to my work.

I was like a child that moment, listening and just eagerly listening to every word she uttered. And I have never felt such happiness after that very encouraging chat.

My heart was so happy it couldn’t hold back from thanking and praising Him! God is just so good! In life, there is indeed such a term known as priority.

I used to say to myself that my top priorities are God, family, studies, friends, self. I know. My priorities are so general. Plus, when in reality, I wasn’t following any of that. I thought it was just a joke to set priorities since we somehow tend to overlook them in the long run.

Motivational speaker Lloyd Luna said, “If you can’t be the best person to do a task, then don’t do it.”

I hesitated to believe that statement since I am a person who seek for excellence in everything I do. But he was true. My cell leader Ree Soria also reminded me almost the same thought during an accountability.

“Saying no doesn’t mean you’re weak. You’re only teaching yourself to prioritize,” she said.

It’s really hard when God is breaking your attitude from within. He is like digging from the roots when He can just cut down the tree from its bark.

Indeed, it’s really a matter of how great do we trust God and how deep is our love for Him.

Evaluate: Am I willing to submit on His ways completely? Will my heart and mind fully and selflessly lean on God alone?

Lord, organize my mind. Fix my heart and lead my life. Let Your priorities be my priorities as well.

On this day, 10/11/12, I was reminded and I wholeheartedly responded. In Him, I trust.
Lord, have Your way in me. 😀

I could still remember the lyrics of my composition We love:

To live, and not to boast.
To laugh, and not to mock.
To love, and yet to love more.

Like my God, I will live, laugh and love as I represent Him in this world. 🙂

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