Overwhelmed

I just finished a meeting today, hoping to be back on track tomorrow. But before going home, I knew I have to write this.

Last week, I got tied up with pressures. I sent the SMS below to some while staying in a convenient store.

These are the days when all I want to do is to free the Mind, moments when I just sit and kill Time.

Too much Load can be awful.

Where’s Faith when I need her the most?

-04.12.12 7:20 pm @ Ministop-Valley Golf

Honestly, I was out of focus. This weariness has kept me from doing my activities.

I know in myself that I have to fulfill my commitments, be an overcomer and at the same time glorify God.  However, I got too overwhelmed with my pressures at school and publication. With this, I ended failing with  my loads, like reporting regularly, finishing the liquidation report, doing press releases and letters, going home,  or even resting and enjoying summer.

Despite the intense summer heat, I felt as if I was stuck in a raging storm. Things were getting harder each day. Loads kept on growing. Pressures never stopped from increasing. People became too demanding.

I could let go anytime I want. But, there’s something unknown in me that held me from leaving – faith.

I kept asking myself why God always believe in my capabilities. I wonder if He’s not aware that I’m drowning; that I can no longer take the loads; that I am so weak in fulfilling everything.

Today, God enlightened me.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

-2 Corinthians 12:9

The truth is God wants me to trust in Him, to find my strength in Him, to cry out for His Name.

Over the weekend, God led me to two events where He challenged my faith.

In a devotion with a friend last Saturday, he shared to me his family – how hard it is for him to raise a family when at this age he should be at school rather than at work and enduring the big eye bags and irregular sleeping habits.

“Pare-pareho man tayo ng nararanasan na problema, hindi masasabi ng isa na naranasan niya ang parehong bigat at hirap na pinagdaanan mo. Kung tutuusin, may kaniya-kaniya tayong mga problemang hinaharap. Kung mabigat na ‘yang dinadala mo para sa’yo, sa iba maaaring hindi at ganoon ka din sa kanya. Pero tandaan natin na nanatiling tapat ang Dios sa kabila ng lahat. Kailangan lang nating maging tapat din sa Kanya.” 

Those words hit like thunders to my soul. He was right. I can never compare the weight of my load to anyone. Only will every load be lightened when I give it to God and let Him carry me. I was challenged with his faith. I prayed that mine will be as strong as his.

Yesterday, I was blessed to hear the sermon “A Glow in the Dark Christian”.

It was brief yet so true. I can never compromise with the dark. I even do not belong to it. Instead, I must be a light and glow in the dark.

When faith’s being shaken, the more I must draw closer to the Rock of my salvation. Because if unaware, I would find myself in the dark again. Of course, I would never want to return to my old life when sin used to dominate.

Blessed, God revealed to me His word, His undying love.

Indeed, faith and fear can never go together. One will overcome the other. And so, if I am to choose which shall prevail, it is faith.

In a world where everything is uncertain, only God remains faithful. No matter how weak we are to handle our burdens, He never forsakes us even in our worst weakness.

Instead of being overwhelmed by troubles, be saturated by His Word. Be overwhelmed by His grace.

Cry out. Have faith. Be His.

***

To those who replied that evening, thank you for being concern. I am grateful to God for giving me prayer warriors like you. God bless us. 🙂

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